Friday, June 1, 2012
Don't You Know What Causes That? *Wink, Wink, Nudge, Nudge*
(Sidenote: I've also gotten a couple impatient honks because apparently I wasn't moving my pregnant butt and my two year old across the crosswalk quickly enough even though I have the right of way - Philly drivers, you are the woooooorst.)
Mostly comments have been along the lines of, "You sure are going to have your hands full!" or "Hope that little guy is a good helper!" I usually just nod and smile.
Well, just this week I got the oh-so-clever, "Don't you know what causes that?" while pointing at my belly and followed by a creepy wink. I was already having a bad day. See the above mentioned honking, the weather was brutal and Leo and I were late for our nap. Even without all that, though - Ew! I was in no mood to be making small talk about sex with a stranger, not to mention my offense at the implication that this pregnancy is unwanted/I'm dumb/I'm having too many kids (at two!), AND not to mention that clearly HE doesn't know what causes this.
I don't consider myself humorless or prude. I suppose the joke could be funny if you had that type of relationship with the person you were making it to - but no. No, no, no. So, after a moment to compose myself I said slowly and clearly, "Yes, I know exactly what causes it. My lesbian partner and I choose donor sperm, monitor for ovulation, make a doctor's appointment for intrauterine insemination, wait a couple weeks, test to see if it worked and then nine months later there's a baby."
My guess is that he won't be making that joke to strangers in the future.